F or Carren Strock, the revelation came when she was She had met her husband — "a terrific guy, very...
There are life-course transitions that are beyond our control. Strock decided to interview other married women who had fallen in love with women, "putting up fliers in theatres and bookstores. I think your work is really meaningful! It wasn't that they'd been repressing their true selves before; it was that without the context of an actual relationship, the little glimmers of occasional fantasies or feelings just weren't that significant.
I have definitely heard some women say, 'It was the person I fell in love with, it wasn't the person's gender,' and I think that that is much more of a female experience than a male experience.
It was not a conscious choice. Then, one day, sitting opposite her best friend, she realised:
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I think the culture tends to lump together change and choice, as if they're the same phenomenon, but they're not. In my study, what I often found was that women who may have always thought that other women were beautiful and attractive would, at some point later in life, actually fall in love with a woman, and that experience vaulted those attractions from something minor to something hugely significant.
This was certainly true for Laura Manning, a lawyer from London, who is now in her late 40s. She married him in her late 20s, had two children in her early 30s, "and once I'd got that maternal part of my life out of the way, I suddenly started thinking about me again.
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Let's Talk About Sex: Crash Course Psychology #27 - Sex Hookups Free